WHO DAT?

I just watched the Super Bowl for the first time without any guys around. It was interesting to say the least. Quiet for one and if I had any questions about what was going on, I just simply made up some weird explanation for it and kept watching. I don't know why but the game seemed to go a lot faster even though though I sat there on the sofa for four hours. I remember the game dragging on in previous years. Maybe I'm starting to get the hang of it now. Pathetic. I can't believe I was a cheerleader for football season and went to a major football college and still don't get it all yet.

I'm glad the Saints won though... Reggie Bush is a cutie. And no one can deny how adorable and sweet it was to see Drew Brees holding his baby boy after they won. I always feel bad for the losing team. Imagine being so close and then really being so far away.

Anyways, since I've been slacking on updating this blog- all I have to say is... 3rd semester is heaven compared to 2nd. We end at 11:00am three days of the week. But of course, there's always a catch with a 40% midterm and 60% final in each of our classes. The exams start next Friday and are every other day until the following Friday- which is conveniently mid-semester break. The benefit of two exams is that we're not studying test to test. But, then there's so much material that's covered that it's hard to pick out what is testable.. because it's all testable!

Even though we have plenty of time to study and stay on top of our classwork, I can't help but to feel behind. The slight feeling of panic is starting to kick in- but that's just what I need! I seem to always pull through in the end. Not that I'm going to cram in the night before, because obviously that's the worst idea ever... but in the end it all just sort of "clicks."

I think my homesickness this semester is starting to subside. I'm adjusting to life on the island, and it's not as bad as I thought from previous semesters. Sure, I don't have all of the luxuries that I do in the states, but it's made me appreciate all of the simple things in life. I promised my parents I wouldn't come home mid-semester this time and though I wish I could visit home, it's a weird feeling when I do go home. It's almost as if I'm caught in a limbo. I can't figure out where I fit in. It's this surreal life. And then when I come back from the states to this island, it's like a dream. There really are some days that I walk outside my apartment and can't believe I'm on and island studying vet med.

NoVA got hit with 30'' of snow this past weekend and I am uber jealous. Snow is my absolute favorite and though it snows every year... it's never ever like that! AND, maybe a few more inches this Tuesday?! Ridiculous. But I can't complain, because the night I flew back last semester, I woke up to 24'' of snow :) Good thing I flew in that Friday night because flights were cancelled and delayed- I would've cried.

On a random tangent, I had been hearing that the book He's Just Not That Into You written by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo was a "must read" for ladies everywhere. I did watch the movie and wasn't impressed but I went ahead and downloaded the e-book... and it's simply amazing. It's an eye opener for women that naively choose to keep them closed. I'm not saying that one should follow that advice religiously, but seriously ladies- you know when enough is enough and when you deserve more. Some chapters didn't really relate to me personally, but it still was an excellent and fast read. Most of the situations given are ones that anyone would be able to relate to. I had that, "OMG-- that's SO true. What am I thinking!?" feeling after reading some of the passages. No more making excuses for your man! It's truly empowering for a woman. Though, following through is another book in itself, right?

I never got to do an "End of 2009 Analysis" and "2010 Resolutions" entry. But in a nutshell, 2009 was the beginning and end of many things in my life. And I transitioned into the New Year with a totally exotic and unfamiliar feeling of chaos. I've always had my professional and personal life figured out... all on a timeline. That stupid timeline of mine! And in my perfect, well-planned life... it felt like someone grabbed me and shook me upside down scattering my itineraries everywhere. It's a scary feeling- not knowing what the hell is going on in your life. Sure, I know I'm in school and I'll be a veterinarian in a couple of years... but in so many ways, I'm still scared. To me, there's more to life than your job- even if you love it. You need someone to love it with, right?

2010 is a year of change and really growing as an individual. My resolutions? Think of me more. Do things for me and what I want. Stop being so negative. Look for the good in all situations and people. Toughen up my skin for hardships in life. Smile more, worry less. Take more risks. Let go and let God.

I was always told by older sorority sisters what aKDPhi really teaches you... to be a STRONG, INDEPENDENT WOMAN. And what song just came into my mind? Destiny's Child- Survivor. Okay, that's a bit dramatic.. but it works. If I could narrate my life through songs, I totally would.

Time flies when you're having fun!

Sike.

But time is flying! I can't believe it's already October, and I have been very bad with keeping up with this blog! It's been so long since I've last written. I did finish 1st semester successfully, but there is always room for improvement!

I came back to the island after a few travel complications that delayed my arrival for 3 days and allowed me to visit two other islands before getting to St. Kitts!! Chris came down with me and I'm sure he had a blast... because he wants to move here. He's crazy- because this place is not my vacation contrary to what most of you all think! In fact, there are times when I forget that I'm on an island!! The island equals exams, insomnia, sweat, bug bites, humidity and stress!!

But it's October now and in a nut shell, I've got about two months until I'm off island for winter break and I cannot wait! Second semester is rumored around here to be a hellish semester. Not that the material is hard-- because it's actually really interesting!-- it's just SO much at once. At our two week mark into the semester, we had so much material that made it seem like we were months into the term. It is a bit overwhelming but it is nice to be constantly busy. As compared to last semester in which there is one notorious class for failing first semesters, we have three. Yes, THREE. How intimidating is that! I have to do my best to stay on top of the material but I must admit, after being in a classroom or lab for about 6-7 hours a day, it's hard to stay completely on track. It does take a lot of discipline-- or else it ends up in cramming-- and you'll learn quickly that you can't pull a method that worked in undergrad in veterinary school!

This semester consists of Parasitology, Immunology, Physiology II, and Anatomy II. It's starting to get a little more clinical- which is always good. I'm trying to store all of this material into a corner of my brian so I can remember it during licensing exams! In parasitology, they give us a few sample board questions, and of course we know it now when they JUST go over the material, but in a couple of years... yeaaaaa... need to try and really actually learn the material instead of cramming it in and then forgetting it after the exam. It's still confusing sometimes, because some of the material we learn makes me feel like I'm studying human medicine! But then I quickly remember that I'm learning about several species of animals when there are minute differences for everything. Anatomy is the worst for that.

Though I did like living on campus, it is nice having my own place. I live really close to school so I get to come home during our two hour lunch breaks and relax. Hopefully, I get to foster an animal! I'm so use to having a furry friend with me, it's weird without one :(

I haven't been to the beach for the past few weeks and I already feel like I'm deathly pale. So, I'm going to go for a couple of hours this weekend and hopefully revive my tan. Won't you all be jealous when I come back in December golden, and you all are transparent?!

On a random note, growing up, everyone older than you tells you to enjoy the time you have right there and then- but you just wanted to grow up. Now that I look back on my childhood/teenage years... I want to go back! I got really homesick and looked through a gazillion pictures and realized that time flew by way too fast and makes me wish I could have stayed and appreciated those times more. So, I've decided that though the next couple of years may be hell at times... I'm going to enjoy it! I am making great memories, learning a lot about veterinary medicine AND myself, and really growing up.

I still catch myself saying, "When I grow up..." I want to stay young forever!

The Final Stretch!

Our exams start this Friday- which means, in less than two weeks I am done with first semester :) Can't believe how fast time flew by! Everyone keeps saying we'll be off island before we know it, and I'm starting to believe how true that statement is! I feel like as I'm getting older, time goes by so much faster =T

I'm looking forward to going home though. I love the island at times, but home is where my heart is.

GAH! So, last night I did three loads of laundry only to find out at the end that the dryers were not working. I had to hang up probably over 50 pieces of clothing all over my tiny room. This was all AFTER I spent $$$ to get the dryer running. FAIL. At least my room smells good. How annoying is that, to have my clothes still all over my room.... I feel claustrophobic! I took pictures which I'll upload later.

I should be studying, but it's hard to gather the motivation sometimes. Story of my life, I suppose. Tomorrow I have nutrition sessions and then I'm planning on staying in the anatomy lab for a few hours. Sounds like fun! I have my Anatomy lab final on Friday, Monday is Physiology, Tuesday is Anatomy written final, Wednesday is MicroAnatomy/Histology, and Thursday is Nutrition! The best for last-- haha oh, and all these are cumulative! Thank goodness I took good notes from the beginning of the semester, that way I can go through my notes. Somewhere in between my sleepless days of studying, I need to get my room together for check out! I just hope I don't miss my connecting flight in Miami- I have less than 2 hours to get through customs onto my flight!

I think I've developed some kind of complex with tan-ness here! It's been a week since I've been to the beach, and since I won't be there for awhile, I SWEAR I'm getting paler and paler each minute. It's okay, I plan on staying at the beach all day Thursday and Friday before my flight :) I guess there is an upside to going to school on a beautiful island!

K, enough for now ! Must focus! Just wanted to drop a line and let everyone know I'm still alive... first semester hasn't killed me yet!

TGIF, Everybody.

That's what my physiology teacher says on Fridays- it's our last class of the day and of the week. It's especially nice to hear and then look over at the clock and see that we are getting out a few minutes early :)

Hopefully that'll happen today !

Only at the request of...

My cousin am I updating my blog :) Anyways, it's a good time since I am dedicating tonight to hardcore nutrition studying for my 7am exam. I just downed some left over pizza and some celery sticks, yummy. Not really... I'm sure for my life after St. Kitts I won't be eating a lot of pizza, ramyun, mac and cheese and peanut butter & jelly.

This weekend was uneventful to say the least- and I'm super jealous of everyone who attended BBQs & fireworks. I literally only studied nutrition all weekend trying to find different ways to make memorizing all of the digestible energy, crude fiber, crude protein and dry matter intakes a little bit easier but to no avail! Straight memorizing it is. Then of course, don't let me forget the splendid dairy and beef cattle cycles-- trust me, 6:00pm Sunday night and I really couldn't look at any more nutrition material. How many goat, cows, grass/legumes/grain pictures can you look at before really starting to feel the vomit build up in the back of your throat?! Not fun... I want to just get this exam over with! From what I hear, this professor can get picky and start asking questions on the smallest details that were only mentioned briefly in class, so it's insane trying to remember everything--- and still remember the larger picture! The TA's have told us to prepare to not do well on this exam and to try and do awesome on the 200 point final. There was a lesson plan schedule change our semester with what professors would be on the final, and this nit-picky teacher won't be as heavily weighed on the final, but this second test is ALL him. Good stuff.

I'm super duper excited though to go home this Thursday! And in the midst of all my excitement, I almost forgot that it's my birthday Wednesday :) 23 years young. It is young when I think about it- I'm in the younger spectrum of my class, and it makes me feel good to know I'll be done with my DVM at the age of 26! Wha whoo... Dr. Smith- granted, everything happens accordingly and I pass my licensing exams.

My plans for when I go home for 3 days? Eateateateateat. I need some good ol' Korean food in my system. Dinner with the girls Friday night and then off to DC for a night of drinking and dancing with good company. How good will it feel to wear HEELS and NOT flip flops, actually doing make up and hair!?! Saturday family time during the day and wedding in the evening. Sunday tee time to use my clubs that I haven't touched since I've left. I'm sure I'll still suck just as badly as when I last played =P But golf is always good family time. Miss my parents :( Then, dog park for my babies. I miss them the most... can't wait to bury my face in their fur and get those nasty smelling kisses! Cody will probably pee when he sees me.. he does that when he's excited.

The weather has been crappy the past two days- yesterday was a full out storm with thunder, lightening and heavy rain... it better clear up by Thursday. I would cry if they cancelled my flight. But better to be safe than sorry, I suppose.

I know that I'm still darker than what I was before I left, but I swear I'm getting paler! I haven't gone to the beach in three weekends ago and I'm starting to feel antsy that I'm losing all color I've gained. But I'm sure if I came back darker than black, you'd think there was no studying going on, huh!

Anyways, I have an hour left before my next class- so I'm going to do some work in this hour. This blog was uninteresting, but post-visit to DC, I'll have one with pictures galore :)

Can't wait!!

Just a couple of pictures I didn't update on the website- but I'm serious about scaling rocks! I was SO sore I couldn't walk straight for 3 days!

:) My girls make me smile

Is it already July?!

This time next week, I'll be on my flight back to the states- words cannot express how excited I am! Seriously, I'm so ready for this weekend trip back home my eyes well up with tears just thinking about stepping off that place in Washington, DC! I know, I'm in "paradise," but what you all don't see in my pictures are the hundreds of pages of notes I need to read through for just ONE class, the canine bones laying on my desk with handwritten notes everywhere, microscope images on my computer with 1098230782734 things that need to be memorized/learned! It's a well deserved break, especially since it's after my second round of exams are done July 7th. Then I have two more regular class exams for a hellish week of finals- an exam everyday for four days! Of course though, there is light at the end of the tunnel- just gotta keep thinking about that flight back home for 3 weeks on August 14th! I wish I could say I love it here, and though it IS nice to go to the beach and lay out in the sun once in awhile- it's not home. Need my family, friends, and my DOGS. I haven't been separated from them for this long... ever! It's driving me crazy. Plus, I feel like I'm a different person here on this island. Don't know why, but I am. It'll feel good to be around my friends back at home and dance the night away drinkin' shots-- NO MORE BEERS. I hate beer, but I've definitely grown accustomed to it, especially because it is cheaper than water. I even told my dad how much more water and soda was here than beer, and he told me to get beer instead!

Anyways, my brother came to visit for 12 days and though it was fun, definitely was a distraction! The only studying I got done was during the day and for a few hours after classes when he went out with a couple other people that were visiting. I'm sure he thought I was living de life here- haha, what an illusion! Though I must admit, it was refreshing to have family here and I was a bit sad when he had to leave. WHICH BY THE WAY, was another story- his flight was canceled to the next day, and I swear if that happens to me Thursday... all hell will break loose! Well, we did a lot during his trip and that was quite the experience for me as well, because I'm usually just studying the weekends away! We hiked a 3500 feet volcano that I will NEVER EVER do again! The hike was called the "Reich Hike" that was marked by my crazy nutrition professor, and the whole time I was hiking it, I thought it matched his personality. There was no "trail," we had to scale rocks, climb ropes, go through shoulder high grass, hold onto trees and vines for dear life, but it was worth it when we got to the top! We signed the log book, but then that's when I really wanted to cry because we had to go back down. All in all, it was a 12 hour day-- yea, never again. Thanks for the experience, I've crossed off a thing to do on my "Bucket List."

I can't believe it's already July- I've been here since April 25th, and it did go by fast, but at the same time it feels like I've been here longer. What more, is that I can't believe how much I've learned! Today, as we had to flip our dog cadaver over to begin dissecting the opposite side for veins/nerves/arteries, I realized... I know every muscle, bone, tendon and ligament in the canine, horse, and cow! Well except for the head which is reserved for 2nd semester-- I couldn't believe it! I'm excited to go home next week and palpate Cody & Lacey for the structures that I've learned about. And when I see them pooping, I'll know what muscles they are using! It's fascinating, I swear! Plus, all the other stuff I've learned, how muscles contract, how blood works, how the heart pumps... it's all falling into place! And to look at slides and be able to identify things, etc... it's crazy! What I've learned in 2.5 months... can't even imagine how much I'll learn in the upcoming semesters! Though, it does have it's consequence of hours of studying... you wouldn't even know how much work we put in here! There's this shirt that is for sale here, and it says something along the lines of, "I'm studying to become an anesthesiologist, cardiologist, radiologist, surgeon, dentist, obstetrician, nutritionist... that's right, I'm studying to be a veterinarian!" There were more things listed, but you get the idea! On top of learning how to do all sorts of jobs in one, we have to learn about more than one species... so why am I doing this again...?!?! haaahaaaa :)

But that's enough talking about school stuff! Why am I spending all that money to fly back home for 3 days? (okay, not MY money... thank you mom and dad!!) It just so happens to be the weekend after my exams like I already stated, Jun & Miriam's wedding weekend, and dadadaaaaa- my birthday weekend! I don't know how much I can cram into 3 days, and I have to wake up early to do my studying before playing- but there are a lot of things I want to do... and eat! I think it'll be nice and refreshing to come back re-energized and prep myself for finals. I'm sure seeing my furry babies will put things back into perspective! I'm super excited to see everyone! Yaaaay :)

Anyways, tonight is a little bit of a breather, since our exam is on Tuesday-- but can't really relax for that class. It's the weed out class for 1st semester and it will fail you if you're not ready! Failing is not an option for me, so I gotta get it together! So- that's it for this week's update, gonna study some more! Gotta keep my mind focused then look forward to going back to the states!!

For pictures, click here.

Missing You.

Today is the 2nd anniversary, if you can even call it that, of my grandmother's death. It still hurts when I think about it, and I doubt that the day will ever come when I can think of her without having my eyes well up with tears. She was an amazing person- and I hope that I can still make her proud. I wish she was still here on this earth to see the things that we're all accomplishing. I know she'd be so happy to say that her grand-daughter is in veterinary school! She always boasted about Alex and me. I always have her in the back of my mind.

If I could re-do any moment, I would have taken more time out of my days when I was away at school to call her- or even when she was in the hospital... I wish I stayed longer by her sides those days she was awake. I remember once I called her just to say hi while I was away at school, and her voice was cracking because she was so happy to hear my voice. I should have called more. I even told her i'd be back the last day I saw her... I said I'd stop by once more before I went to school- and I couldn't make it. They say that you never know when someone's last day is and to to not take the time you have with them for granted. It's so true. I never knew that day would come when she would leave me. I was always anxious for my visits with her. I wish I could just have one more.

My fondest memory of her during her last few days, was the last time I visited her at the hospital. My parents had already left the room and I was in the room still holding her hand, I couldn't leave her side. She looked at me and mouthed, "I love you." She had breathing tubes and still wasn't able to speak. I remember just breaking down and really feeling a whole mixture of emotions at once. Later that week, I called my dad while he was at the hospital, and I heard her say, "I love you baby!" in the background. I guess those are bittersweet memories. What I would do to hear those words from her mouth again is endless.

She'll always be the grandma that braided my hair way too tight when I was little, and bought me the cutest/fanciest dresses and outfits ever. She would let me have two toys from Toys 'R Us and always snuck in a few extra bucks into my pockets under the table. I would come home on weekend visits only to find a huge bag of the latest jewelry, clothes or even a huge stuffed animal laying on my bed. She was the grandma that took me blackberry/raspberry picking in the summer and fed me until I couldn't move. She was the one who attempted to teach me how to knit and always made me pillows, blankets, vests, hats, and hemmed my clothes or fixed the holes in my sweaters. She was the feisty sassy one who would yell at our waitress when our service was slow or when she felt that people wronged her. She was the grandma that has a laugh I can still hear in my head and was always so happy to see her grandchildren. Oh, how I miss you so much...

She fought her hardest during her time in the hospital. She was so young to be gone. But everyone has their time, and hers was two years ago. I will never ever forget those last 24 hours with her. She even opened her eyes when Alex and I got there and saw us one more time. I remember exactly how she looked. She was the most beautiful ever and looked at peace. She is probably having a blast in heaven right now :)

The only place I'm able to meet her now is in my dreams, but I'm happy with that.

I hope I make you proud, grandma. I miss you so much. Watch over us every day and keep everyone strong.